Existential COVID Crisis

“The only courage that matters is the kind that gets you from one moment to the next.”- Mignon McLaughlin

The first tangible response I had to the pandemic was, "I am unimportant".  Frontline healthcare workers and essential workers, they matter.  Everyone in the middle needs to stay out of the way. I am part of the middle.  Cue the existential dread.  If you had the choice of being stranded on a desert island with a doctor or a visual artist/writer/yogi/ whatever the hell I am, who would you chose?A pandemic is cause for self-reflection. 

Le bonheur

During an online edition of Alliance Français Café-Philo the other morning, the topic of discussion was le bonheur (happiness).  We talked about what happens to our happiness when what we've used to define ourselves is gone.  We can't cut your hair into our signature bob (although I'm sure Anna Wintour has found a way) and that new car we identify with is sitting idle in the garage.  Our work, which was a source of self-confidence, is in a state of upheaval.  The external displays of status and all other manners of establishing our self-importance have been taken away.  What's left can be foreign and disorienting.  The result can be deep unhappiness, an existential depression.Who we were before COVID is gone and that's scary as hell.Can we be happy when the metrics we've used to define ourselves no longer exist? 

In your own company

I'm fortunate.  I'm an introvert who craves time alone to do any number of things: write, paint, exercise and laugh at my own jokes.  Hikikomori for the win.  My heart goes out to those who haven't spent time alone prior to COVID-19.  I wonder how many of us are now realizing the person starring back at us in the mirror is a stranger. 

Existential needs

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs states that people have needs in order of importance: physical, security, love, ego and self-actualization.  The pandemic has suddenly put the certainly of the first two in question. If we have those covered though, we can say we are privileged enough to use the opportunity to skip over the fourth.  The desire for prestige, power, and recognition can take a backseat to love and self-actualization. This includes saying goodbye to perfection in the way of our kid's homeschooling, our productivity, and pretty much everything else. 

"When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves."- Viktor Frankl

We've been given the perfect excuse to focus on our relationships and creativity, and to redefine ourselves; let's use it.  Greater happiness could very well be the end result.

x KM

P.S.  For anyone faced with their own mental health existential COVID crisis, I think you'll find the below resources helpful. --- 

Resources

#SickNotWeak's Isolation Nation, Michael Landsberg's COVID-inspired mental health show.  I highly recommend Episode 2 with guests actor/comedian Sean Cullen and clinical neuropsychologist and psychologist Diana Velikonja.  Mr. Cullen had me howling for the first time in weeks. Three words: hip replacement twerking. (Incidentally, way better than Star Wars Episode 2.)

Free online University of Toronto course: Mind Control: Managing Your Mental Health During COVID-19 taught by Steve Joordens.

Mental health app: Sanvello, now offering free premium access through the COVID-19 crisis.

Calm app: Another one of my favourite meditation, sleep, and mental health apps.

Yoga International: Enjoy 30 days of free online yoga.  The classes aren't live so you can even take them without pants.  Whatever gets you to the mat, I say.

Strava app: Run, bike, walk, skip, yoga, or skip your way to a healthier, saner you.  The basic plan is free and provides more than enough oomph for even the above-average user. Perks: you can keep track of your activities and progress, take part in month-long fun fitness challenges, earn swanky badges, and design fancy routes in the shape of, well, whatever you'd like.  I'm partial to fish myself.

Nike Training Club app: Free yoga, mobility, strength, and endurance sessions anywhere from 5 mins to 46 mins.  Many can be done without props.  Some of the yoga sessions are family-focused.